choices
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photo by Siti Saad
Choices, changes, decisions, indecision’s – the older I get the more complicated things get and I’m starting think it’s me being a big ol’ drama queen!
I don’t think I like drama, but when things seem too easy, I immediately distrust whatever “it” is cuz nothing, nothing-nada, in life is ever really easy. I think it’s so easy though to get too caught up in the complexities and in’s and out’s of life that you kinda forget what’s really up –like, um, living life to the fullest!
I read two inspiring things today that really made me stop and think about the up’s and down’s I’ve been experiencing the past several months and while I’m not “cured” I think perspective is always awesome.
The first inspirational post I read today was from my friend and fellow Galavanting Gal Maren Hogan. In her post today she explains why she decided to transition into a new, full-time gig with Galavanting. She writes “In order to receive something your hand must be open, not a closed fist, still holding tightly to something that is no longer yours.” I’ll admit, I read that and cried. I even wrote Maren and told her so. I don’t think I can put into words how much this sentence really hit me, it makes so much sense! omg. Maren is so smart.
The second post is from someone I don’t know but I read her blog occasionally and it had a quote that said “choosing doesn’t limit your choices — it just changes them.” Again, wow. Just because I make one decision doesn’t mean I won’t be making more decisions again. Sounds like a no brainer, but I really needed reminding of this. And if I’m wrong (and it happens, true story), I will just have to pick up my boot-straps and make another decision. For some reason it always feels like every choice is final….it’s like:
this - is - the – last - choice - you’ll - ever – make – so - you - better – get - it - right
wow, talk about pressure!
Sure, things come with consequences and reactions and you can never tell how one decision will cause you to make others but let’s face it, if we put the weight of the world on every decision, big or small, then we’re going to be lugging around a lot more than we can handle and should handle. And really we don’t know what would happen if we didn’t do what we decided - we just assume we know what would have happen and truth is, we don’t know! Am I getting a lil existential here? Uhm, maybe a wee, lil bit.
I guess what I’m saying is, I’m less scared than I was a week ago about changes and not knowing what will happen. I’m so happy for the decisions I’ve made cuz they brought me here and now I have more choices and will continue to have more choices to make – just like everyone else in the world. I’ve been getting too caught up in the intensity of what’s been going on in my world and yes, I still have hopes, I’m always imagining what could/would/will be but I think the fear of not really knowing has subsided. I don’t think my drama moments or “spaz-outs” are done, in fact I’m sure I’ll have more in my lifetime, but I think I’ll try to reign in my drama and pass the crown off to someone else who wears it better – I’m more of a feathers-in-my-hair kinda girl anyway.
beginnings, control-freak, endings, life, love, work
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choices, drama queen, future, life, past
Themocracy